Listen Harder, Talk Softer

Updated: Jan 25, 2021

Sales is hard. However, let me make the pitch to you that it can be easier. In fact, not only can it be easier, but you can close more deals when applying a certain method.

There is nothing new about this method. It is the same thing so many books and gurus have talked about from Plato to Dale Carnegie.

Talk softer, listen harder. People just want to be heard. They want to feel genuinely understood and appreciated. Adam Smith tells us humans "man naturally desires, not only to be loved, but to be lovely". In this, he is speaking to our human desire to be deserving of love and admiration.

Now, making someone feel not only loved but deserving of love is not something that can be formulized and plugged into an A.I. (though without a doubt google is trying). Nor can you, as the salesman or woman, manipulate someone into feeling this way, though many will undoubtedly try.

It starts with listening. Listening is your tool, your armament, in understanding the client. Listen longer than you should, wait longer to speak. Allow yourself to fall into the thoughts of the client when they are speaking. It will be hard at first, (you'll be most likely be bad at it in the beginning) but you'll get better at it as time goes on.

Get to know your client on a deep level. This doesn't mean having a checklist of facts that you try to get out of your client. Ask questions if the conversation stalls, but ask questions your genuinely interested in knowing the answers to. When you ask the right question, the client will talk.

Next time you have your first conversation with a lead, keep these 3 things in mind.

1. Listen longer than is comfortable for you.

2. Don't formulate your own thoughts while the client is speaking. Don't think, just listen.

3. Ask genuine questions you want the answers to.

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